Well, my retreat’s done with. And I’ve realized a lot. Sadly, almost all that I’ve realized were negative.
Like how alone I really am. See, doesn’t it sound pathetic, to begin with?
First of all, I tried to make peace with my ex. While it sounds like a cliche and stupid thing to do, I did it; for the sake of removing the thought that “I’m not okay with someone”. No, it wasn’t really a wise move, but I just tried, hoping that some maturity will kick in so we could at LEAST not be so negative about each other: it didn’t mean we had to be friends or something. So far, I’m guessing she didn’t take it that way though.
Second, was the realization that my high school friends are really gone. I’ve been trying to suck the idea up for quiet some time now, but it’s just during my retreat that a close friend of mine told me, “if they were really your friends, they would have made time for you at some point, so you wouldn’t feel like you were taken for granted. They didn’t, and maybe it’s about time you accepted the possibility that they’re not ‘real’ friends.”
Third, is the realization that I really don’t have much friends when I think about it. I’ve masked for so long that people know bits of my life, but not most of it, so they end up merely being strangers.
Lastly, is the fact that my thoughts are eating me into thinking that there are some things that will repeat, and I will not be able to control…like losing my friends.
I don’t know, really. I just feel really shitty. Don’t exactly know why.
For those who don’t know: there’s a Power Mac Center in SM North Edsa selling cases and accessories for old Apple products for AWFULLY cheaper prices! Yung tipong 1600 naging 150. Seriously. =))
Kanina pauwi, tinanong ko yung security guard sa #SM North, “Kuya, bakit sila tumatawid kahit pula yung ilaw sa sign?” Nagulat ako sa sagot nya: “Nako ser, tumanda na ako dito ganyan pa rin mga tao. Pasaway. Minsan tuloy nalilito mga turista dito kung tanga ba tayo o nananadya lang na ‘di sumunod sa sarili nating mga batas. Mga normal na mamamayan nga ganyan e, pano pa yung mga inaangal nilang pulitiko? Haha!” #pilipinas #pasaway #pilipino
I honestly didn’t know about this before.
Or at least, I didn’t know young people had the guts to do it.
Maybe I just couldn’t believe they’d have THAT much guts to lie about their payments. Like those students who say their tuition fee’s more expensive that it actually is so they could get the excess.
I mean, really, you don’t feel guilty about stealing from your own parents? That looks awful, really. o_o
If you look at Fast and the Furious from another perspective:
There’s this asian drift king. Then there’s this white boy who’s trying to steal his girlfriend, who was backed up by the asian DK’s “best friend”, who was actually stealing shit from the DK and was just using the DK and his connections in the Yakuza.
Then the asian DK’s other buddy died because they chased his ex-best friend, who died in that chase, (and his girlfriend who was with the white boy) after knowing that he really was stealing from them.
The white boy and the asian DK raced, and the asian DK lost. He was banished from Tokyo and the white boy replaced as him as the Drift King.
It’s just how we look at Gary when we play the Pokemon series.
I’m really getting obsessed with upgrading my car, from small accessories to saving up to big ones in the future. If this is a good or bad thing, I don’t know (as of now, at the least).
But if I do continue this, I know that I’d want my car to pay me back in some way. If it means joining car shows (yeah I’m that ambitious, nothing wrong with that :D), I will.
My personal financial management’s getting more complicated, but I like it. I’m learning from it by experience, which teaches me how to adjust and change styles of spending and saving.
I can honestly feel the “adulthood” creeping in. I wonder how I’d learn how to budget my own money when I live independently in the future. Pretty overwhelming when I think about it.
#Appreciationpost for the first sedan I’ve been allowed to drive, which looks good as new after its detailing. So many memories in this #sexy #black #toyota #corollaaltis, really. 😁😁 =)) #sexiness
Now that I’m 18, I’ve discovered one of the major reasons why parents and their children have arguments, specifically about money.
Simply put, it’s the interest in something. Well, let’s break it down to 2 things.
I’m pretty sure they’ll be more things to argue about, and it’s going to be the same for everyone. Different things, but all of them would probably have higher prices.
This is a part of adulthood that makes us, the “fresh” adults, want to have work and salary asap, I guess. Not for all, but for most.
I’m an awfully clingy friend and it’s pretty obvious.
I know I’ve blogged about this a couple of times, but I’d like to specifically think about how I look at my clingy-ness (wait does that word exist?).
Well, I do always try to get with people. When I notice that the people I care about are starting to distance themselves, I try to take action and reach out to them. I’m almost always the one to ask people if we could go out and catch up, and I end up hoping that they’d do the same.
It’s been my “measurement” of if-they-care-or-not-for-me-the-way-I-do-for-them. If they invite me back next time, guess that means we do show effort to have some time for each other.
It’s pretty cheesy and dramatic, really, but it does make sense for me. Only now that I’ve grown up and have matured even just a bit, I learned to do some adjustments and have changed for the better.